About the relief mapping, it's an alternative to parallax but it seems like it 'eyes' more accurate and you can even add an occlusion term
too

About the candle, the lighting effect that it produces is good but I think once you manage to add shadows, it will look way better

You both are working hard on this, which I can judge from the result so keep up that pace, it will result in an even better scene

Cheers

Frazzle