To address point 1), there are plenty of other communities aside from 3DGS that can offer this experience. These include school clubs, IGDA chapter meetings, modding a game, being a beta tester, being part of a games QA. Even other engines such as Torque or 3DRad could have a small project you could tack onto and gain experiences. While these won't likely teach you much about how to program or model, they will teach you how to communicate with others, be an effective part of a team, and perhaps even insight into what it takes to get funded and published. If our community doesn't have this (and IMO it won't for a few years at least), then it's time to look at other places to fill in the gaps (such as gamedev.net or gamasutra.com or igda.com).

To address point 2), I can only offer a series of cliches:

"Every journey of 1000 miles starts with one step" - Ancient Chinese Secret
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it" - Goethe
"Just do it" - Nike

You can read and listen and take classes all you want. But until you put finger to keyboard or pen to tablet you will never transform education into experience. The only way to start is to do just that: start. I can think of no simpler approach.

Also:
"Start Small; Dream Big" - Me
"The best tool I've found to bring the vision to life is prototyping" - Will Wright

If you want to make a MMO, start with a single Client/Server chat program. If you want to make a FPS, start with two blocks tracing each other. To use the parlance, you have to do a Work Breakdown Analysis of your project and start with the smallest tasks first. Be these prototypes or actual working modules, if you start trying to make the whole game at once, you will actually end up making nothing.

And finally:
"Know Thyself" - Bible (I think)

If you know your strengths and weaknesses, then you can compliment one and mitigate the other. Not everyone is meant to be a game designer or producer. Some people may only have enough time to do a few models a week or program a new module every few months. The sooner you know this about yourself, the easier it will be to ask for help and if you are offering help, it will be easier for you to be honest about your abilities (and get paid accordingly)