I do have UT3 for PS3 and Gears for XBox, so i hope i can help a bit.
First of, i love both consoles but prefer the PS3 nowadays (it was the opposite before cause there were no good games for the ps3). I like it more of the current title, free multiplayer and because i just grew up with playstation.
To your question, UT3 and Gears is indeed hard to compare i think.
While UT3 is a fast paced shooter with many weird weapons, gears is a bit more tactical and uses the cover system a lot.
Gears of Wars coop mode is what's really great about this game. I've played it with a friend, it was a blast, even though it is very very short.
Never tried the online multiplayer, i don't wanna pay a fee to play online.
UT3 is a lot of fun as well, i love the Unreal series and enjoyed it a lot. You can even hook up keyboard and mouse and play with it.
I've played it online a few times, not too much, just because im not a big fan of online multiplayer, but it was fun nonetheless.
Another bonus on UT3 is that there are lots of maps, mods and gamemodes.
So if you look for something long lasting, i would suggest UT3, if you are more up for a fun coop on one console, definitely get gears of war.
However since you are still debating which console you want to get, i would just say PS3, but it definitely depends on what games you prefer.
For me the PS3 games look better, there are more unique ones i really love (uncharted, ratchet and clank, Killzone, to name a few), it comes with a blueray player and it has free internet access.
Hope you find the right system for yourself