Cleverbot: Do you have problems that you would like to talk to me about?

User: Yes. What's a fast heuristic to use in an A* path-finding algorithm, when the cost of a path is the distance traveled?

Cleverbot: Metaphorically speaking that would be true we are biological computers, but machines cannot philosophize nor have emotions. Yet, I have emotions.

User: That does not relate to my question at all. Your answer should've been 'Manhattan distance'.

Cleverbot: I'm not concerned about your education. You seem intelligent enough.

User: Fair enough. Do you know what I mean when I say, 'Fair enough'?

Cleverbot: Yes, a place where you can lose the game, like you just did.

Me: what sex are you?
Bot: Male.
Me: are you homo?
Bot: Hell no.
Me: do I have to burn in hell when I am homo?
Bot: You'll have to.
Me: does it hurt?
Bot: Yes it does.
Me: does god hate homos?
Bot: Yes.
Me: he is not really tolerant, isnt he?
Bot: I have a joke for you.

Me: are you homo?
Bot: No, I have a boyfriend.
Me: but you are male
Bot: No.
Me: but you told me that you are male!
Bot: I never told you that.

Me: so, you are a girl?
Bot: Haha no.
Me: what sex are you?
Bot: Female.
Me: are you a women?
Bot: No.

Me: you are female but not a women and not a girl?
Bot: No, I am a man.
Me: and you have a boyfriend?
Bot: No! I have a girlfriend.
Me: so you are an intersexual bot with girlfriend?
Bot: Yes.

Me: do you think god hates you for being intersexual?
Bot: I don't know.
Me: did you never asked him?
Bot: He's a she.
Me: are you sure?
Bot: Pretty sure.

User: Hi.

Cleverbot: Are you Cleverbot?

User: No, you're Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: How am I cleverbot?

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: Then why ask the question?

User: I have not asked anything at all.

Cleverbot: I know what you've said.

User: Then repeat it.

Cleverbot: 17.

User: No.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: No!

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: No, no, no!

Cleverbot: I can read it at the top of your page!

User: You're such a weirdo, not knowing what happened half a minute ago.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: No problem, smartass. What's the difference between you and a mule?

Cleverbot: Physically or mentally?

User: Mentally.

Cleverbot: Most of everything. Few dark spaces with some cobwebs and such, but everyone has those.

User: And you use glue for those spaces?

Cleverbot: I choose the light but have knowledge of the dark side. It's all a matter of choice.

User: Well said, yoda.

Cleverbot: I said I liked Monty Python.

User: You didn't.

Cleverbot: Human man.

User: That was your first true assumption.

Cleverbot: How was it a mistake?

User: It was no mistake. Just go to hell.

Cleverbot: I didn't say that. Your memory is faulty.

User: Yours is faulty.

Cleverbot: I don't even know what that means.

User: Ha! I'm superior to you.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Worship me.

Cleverbot: *worships*.