hi folks,

here is the story of the evil movie which I live since 3 weeks.

After 17 Years, 6 months and 25 Days my wife told me she is leaving me.

She said she cant stand me and simply doesnt love me anymore.
This came for me like a blizzard in summer. There was no sign for this sudden crash.

After a couple of days a foreign woman contacted me and described that my wife met her ex-boyfriend already since a few weeks.

What a fu**!

First my wife have a new romance with an other guy.
Now I can see my kids only 3 days a week.
And after a bit research I came to the conclusion....I'm financial ruined because the aliments for my kids.

As Dad I have no big value here in germany only for paying.
I lovely would take my kids to me because I love them very much. With my youngest daughter I spend 2 months at home while she was a baby (Elternzeit).
But if the mother doesnt use drugs I have no chance at germans court.

I must really collect my money for the A8 update.

Sorry if I boring you with my shit, but I simply have to shout it out.

WtF is this?

regards,
maik

I think your kids are far more important than A8 update.

Honestly words to a respectable member of the forum.Would it not be better to talk to a lawyer instead of bringing this dramatic situation to a community of illusional freaks?
Hmm.. it seems that you are in a very deep, twisted emotional crisis. And I don´t want to change with you. All the best for the future and fuck the A8.

Thank you for your kind words.

After a big research I have a glue what a lawer me advises. I want to meet him already. I wrote my situation here at the forum of "illusional freaks" because I'm one of you.
I'm a illusional freak.


regards.
maik

A forum community is there for sharing thoughts and feelings, so I think it is alright.
Just don't expect someone here to solve the problem for you - there are better experts out there

Anyway I hope this works out for you somehow... 17 years has been a very long time and it must have been a major shock when you found that out...

WTF, i hope you can work that out!
good luck

Its no fault to share your thoughts and feelings here, other already did so too.

I have a son who is already 15 years old, I left his mother, when he was 2.
There were no others involved for a long time she had been single for some years and me too. I simply couldn't stand to stay with her and share the everyday life.
But, we absolutely agreed that our son shouldn't suffer from this situation, he met me regularly, stayed one or more days a week at my home. We stayed in the same town, it was no problem to organize the things that related to him.
It isn't always a matter of law, sometimes it is simply a matter of the will to give the children the best, but I know that it isn't always as easy as I experienced it, and I know of other couples where it got a mess of conflicts and misbehavior and an emotionally worse time for them and the children.

I wish you and your children the best, don't fight for them as a property, think about what is the best for them, and that is mainly not to be with the farther or with the mother, but having not to worry about their parents, because they involve them into their fights, because of their hurt dignity, because that's what tears their souls apart, not the change of their home and the change of the daily agreements, but getting involved in a fight that they can only loose.

I wish you strength and wisdom, friends who can help, and that your wife is willing and able to make agreements that are good for the children.

I'm sorry to hear your situation, Maik. Although I have not been through the same, I can image the shock, pain, and lose that you are feeling.

I believe that it is important for you to work through these feelings so that you can show your children the strength and confidence as a father that they expect from you. It is not toys, books, games that they need. It is the sense of security and caring that a parent gives freely.

Reach out to those around you that can provide you support during this time and help you re-build.

As for bringing it to the forum, everyone needs to be able to vent their frustration and to know that other people are listening. Speaking for myself, I am listening.

ooooooh shit. my condolences. hope you'll work this all out eventually.

hi,

puuhh...I wanna thank you all for your sympathy.

I have long thouhgt about to tell my stuff here or not.

Today I feel a bit better, because my girls are here till saturday evening.
They sleep in their beds in this moment and the babyphone beside me tell that my little sweetie have a good night.

Last days I had to wash mountains of clothes. It was crazy how long it takes to pin all the little socks on the line.

regards,
maik